If you’ve never asked yourself, a colleague, a friend, or your PET about whether or not they think that guy is into you, then lady you are telling fibbies and let's leave that right here at this metaphorical door.
At some stage in our dating lives we will all ponder this age old question; IS he into me?
You’ll examine evidence, signs, consult with friends, flip to the back of a magazine to check the horoscopes section - all just to try and work out if someone finds you cute.
But self doubt, the pesky little fucker, pops his head up and makes it tricky to tell if those ‘signs’ are just in your head or if the dude really is sat at his desk or across the bar picturing you in some red lace panties.
The point here is that whether it’s a guy you’ve just spotted, a colleague, an old friend - whatever - you want to know how to recognise when he's throwing you some sexy little signals and if he's showing the signs of being interested in you.
And you can. We all can.
1) He doesn’t get uncomfortable by PSI (personal space invasion)
London girls, I know how much you hate personal space invaders. There is a whole section of hell designed for those people that sit next to you on the tube when the whole rest of the carriage is fecking empty. But in the dating world, use this invasion to your advantage. If you’re chatting, move a little closer, push the boundaries a tiny bit. Does he respond by moving away? He doesn’t want you up in his space. Does he mimic your body language? Great, you’re in there.
2) He’s making eye contact, or bursts of eye contact
Just because he’s not giving you a ‘serial killer’ style glare from across the room, it doesn’t mean he isn’t into you. But if every time you look over, he glances your way - or you catch him quickly looking away when you do look over - then find those red panties (they may be hiding under three layers of beige-toned briefs) because he’s probably picturing you in them. Or at the very least, you’re capturing his attention and it’s a good sign.
3) His friends glance over at you too
If the guy is out with a friend, or a group of friends, and he’s spotted you and thinks you’re attracted then it’s likely he’ll point it out. Men really aren’t that subtle. Keep an eye out to see if he says something to his mate. Can’t hear over the background noise? You don’t need to. If his friend turns around to have a little look at you too then there’s a high chance he’s having a little peep at the hottie (yes you, don’t look around) his friend just pointed out.
4) He makes fun of you or picks up on little changes
If you already know this man then you look out for the way he acts around you. Does he sometimes make fun of you, or tease you? You might have heard of the term ‘negging’ - a stupid pick-up artist word that means to knock a girl’s confidence with a backhand comment for the sole purpose of shock factor and to be a giant asshole. Well, it’s on a similar theme to this, but without as much pre-meditated assholeness. Male flirt tactics usually include some form of playfulness or teasing, and can be a good indicator that they’re into you (note: a man who's just plain mean is an asshole - it's not flirting - there is a difference). If they also notice little changes like when you try a new hairstyle, or wear something different - that means they probably pay attention more than you think. Both are good signs.
5) His gaze falls on your lips
The little micro expressions he gives out will tell you a lot (I’ll be doing a whole post about this soon because if you can learn to read body language you are wiz-inning). Men will focus on things they’re drawn to, and a glance at your lips or their eyes getting a little bit wider if they do focus on them for a second, is a good indicator that they’re drawn to a sensual part of your body.
Now it's all well and good, him throwing you off some signs. But if he's not budging over to chat to you, or he's not pushing your relationship past the friend-zone, then you're going to want to know how you can help him along (more about that in 'why do men find it hard to approach women?'.
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